Matthew 6 (NLT)
14 “If you forgive those who sin against you, your heavenly Father will forgive you.
15 But if you refuse to forgive others, your Father will not forgive your sins.
Did you ever realize that both God and Satan have a huge interest in forgiveness? Seriously. For Satan, holding onto unforgiveness gives him a legal right to inflict you with demons. On the other hand, God puts such a huge importance on forgiving others that the bible flat out says that if we do not forgive others, God will not forgive our sins. 🤯
Vows of Unforgiveness
Ever made a vow like one of these? 😠
- The ***** cheated on me! I hate him and I wish he would die!
- My parents abused me my whole life and did nothing for me. I hate them!
- That *** stole all the money and left me with nothing. I hope she burns in hell!
- He raped me and lives with no consequences for his actions. I will never forgive him for what he did to me!
- I got fired. My supervisor will be getting a letter from my attorney!
- He killed my child, and I will never forgive him!
These are just a few real-life examples that I have heard from people who were holding onto unforgiveness. So, does God expect us to be a door mat and just let people abuse us, victimize us, and take advantage of us? Absolutely not. 🛑 Instead, we should be assertive and let people know when they have done something wrong and address it calmly but directly. If necessary, we should pursue legal action. More importantly, we need to keep in mind that we have a God who avenges our wrongs in life. We should pray to Him for guidance and wisdom on how to handle our situations and traumas. 🙏
Unexpected Traumatic Events
Any time we have an unexpected traumatic event strike our life, outside of reading the bible and prayer, we should seek professional counseling/therapy to process through the trauma in an emotionally healthy fashion. So, counseling/therapy and prayer will help us begin to start the process of forgiveness and emotional healing. Keep in mind, this greatly reduces the risk of getting demons from the trauma. Speaking of demons and trauma, listen to TBE 8 Trauma Demons for a great training on how demons enter through trauma. Sadly, if you do not go for counseling/therapy and instead, try to work through the trauma on your own, you may get demons. Why?
Often, you may pick up unhealthy ways of coping with your emotional pain from the trauma. Some examples of unhealthy coping mechanisms include:
- Using marijuana or other drugs to escape the pain
- Avoidance of close meaningful relationships
- Controlling others
- Isolation
- Workaholism
- Anorexia or bulimia
- Compulsive/obsessive perfectionism
- Manipulating people through sex/seduction
- Rage/anger
- Alcohol
- Gambling
- Pornography
- Being a super religious person
I could go on listing examples of unhealthy coping mechanisms, but I think you get my point. There are many unhealthy ways to handle trauma. Unfortunately, these unhealthy coping mechanisms can open doors to allow demons to enter you. Here is the formula: unresolved trauma + unhealthy coping mechanisms + unforgiveness = potential demon possession. 😈
Encouragement To Forgive
Let me encourage you for a minute my friend. Seriously, I understand trauma and I am sure you do too. For instance, I lost my eyesight at age 17 – the doctors blinded me via laser treatments on my eyes and ruined my life. Worse yet, I lost my marriage of 15 years – my wife left me for another man. Yeah, I get rejection and resentment trust me. Sadly, I was molested as a child. Even more terrible, I have been heavily discriminated against throughout my career as a computer programmer due to my blindness. These are just a few examples of the traumas I have experienced in life and are barely scratching the surface. Why am I sharing this information with you? So you can see that I am a real person just like you. I’m keeping it raw and real with you friend. I am not sharing this information for pity. I’m definitely not one for pity, trust me. 😒
Listen to this though. Despite all of this trauma, there came a point in my life where emotional freedom mattered more to me than what was done to me. Let me repeat that… there came a point in my life where emotional freedom mattered more to me than what was done to me. 💡 Desperately, I wanted out of my prison of emotional suffering and wanted the demons gone. Seriously, I forgave them all. Every person in my life that stabbed me in the back, which abused me, that caused me enough pain to fall to my knees breathless and wanting to die – all of them. I forgave them and let the rage, anger, resentment, and unforgiveness go. For the record, I did not go to any person and say I forgive you. I resolved the forgiveness within myself between me and Jesus. In other words, I am not suggesting to go to your abuser, for example, and say I forgive you. No way! That would just be dangerous and extremely unwise.
So, why did I forgive the people who emotionally crushed me or abused me in life? Simply put, I wanted my emotional freedom. I was sick of letting people and situations control my emotions, thoughts, time, and my life. Today, I have peace because I forgave. Jesus Christ promised us peace:
“I am leaving you with a gift—peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give is a gift the world cannot give. So don’t be troubled or afraid.”
John 14:27 (NLT)
The Journey of Forgiveness
Forgiveness is a journey and can take time. For most, it is not just bam! instant forgiveness. Keep in mind, it takes time to work through trauma and the stages of grief. 🕰️ However, we have to start the journey of forgiveness so we can emotionally heal. In order to tap into the blessing of peace that Jesus gave us, we must forgive those who have wronged us. Seriously, unforgiveness blocks that level of peace in our minds and hearts. So, I forgave, went through my own exorcism to expel the demons who entered through my traumas, and now the emotional suffering is over. Friend, I encourage you to do the same. So, start your own journey of forgiveness with a licensed counselor so you can get out of your emotional suffering. In addition, I also encourage you to contact me and get an exorcism to clean up the demons who may have entered through the traumas you have experienced. ❤️
Ok, here is how reading this post is going to end, you ready? You are going to be one of two different types of readers. For instance, the first reader says wow! This was so spot on, and it really challenged me. Then that person never changes. It was just a challenging read for them. 🥱 However, there is the second reader who is you partner! 👍 Your the one who reads it and applies it to your life. Be brave, be bold, and forgive those who have deeply hurt you in life and get your freedom back! Are you ready to start your journey of forgiveness? 🙌
Let’s Contemplate
- Write down three people you have unforgiveness / resentment towards (currently living or passed away).
- When you think of those people in your mind, how does it make you feel? Write down your feelings for each person.
- If you forgave each person, write out how your emotions, thoughts, relationships, and sleep would be different.
- Write down the top 2 to 3 unhealthy coping mechanisms that you use to handle your emotional pain from your own traumas.
- For each unhealthy coping mechanism, write down 2 to 3 healthy ways of handling your emotional pain. Make them practical and more than just reading your bible, prayer, and worship music. Those we should be doing regularly anyhow. So, think on it. 🤔
BTW click on the facebook/twitter/email links at the top of this post and share this post with your family and friends so they can be encouraged and challenged too.
4 comments
What a wonderful read. I never had a problem with forgiveness until recently. For a year, I held onto the anger, sadness and resentment that those I love could hurt me. I definitely believe that I was oppressed by demons because the thoughts were never anything I ever, ever would’ve thought. My anger and bitterness just grew until it was all-consuming. When Jesus freed me from the oppression, I felt the light just surround me. I felt like I could breathe again. The funny thing is, I didn’t realize I was in such a dark place. It’s sneaks up on you sometimes when you are filled with unforgiveness. I absolutely loved this piece you wrote and know firsthand why you do what you do. As soon as the light came back, I felt no anger or resentment and forgave. Then, I had to forgive myself for such negativity and anger that I gave into. Because He forgives, I too forgive. Thank you for sharing!
Christine, thanks for stopping by. Your comment perfectly outline the concepts I was writing about in this article. Nice work forgiving those who have hurt you. Thanks for your honesty and for sharing with all of us! ❤️
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Thanks for sharing this. It’s very open and honest- That’s how we need to be to get free. Forgiveness opens the door to freedom. Vengeance belongs to the Lord anyway
Thanks Marion for visiting and taking the time to share a comment. 👍 Yeah, I am a pretty open person since to me, it is important for everyone to understand that I am just a normal person like everyone else. Just because I host a podcast doesn’t mean I am anything special. 😊